a day in the life of sesshoumaru
by nikore2
Summary: sesshoumaru and rin are living with none other than little ol me!!!!!!!
1. oh no!

Ok people, I need reviews, please. Comments and CONSTRUCTIVE criticism is welcome ^_^.  
  
Disclaimer: why do I have to go through this with you people? Of course inuyasha isn't mine, and just like mette said to ying lin hu, if I owned inuyasha he would be a very sad little puppy (hehehehehehehehehe)  
  
ANYWAY!!!! R  
  
Nikore: sesshoumaru, time to get up!  
  
Sesshoumaru: **grumbles and rolls over** ..no..  
  
Nikore: god.even rin isn't this hard to get up in the morning, so I'll just make this quick ** does the Sheila thing and takes the mattress out from under him**  
  
Sesshoumaru: OK OK!!! I'm up..  
  
** at breakfast**  
  
nikore with headphones on singing into a soup ladle, while cooking break fast: . boku tachiwaaaa, hikiru hodoni, nakushitekuuuu, sukoshi zutsu, itsu wariyaaaaa, uso matoi, tatchisukumuuuuu, koe mo naku. bokutatchi waaaa, samayoinagara, doko mademo, furikaeruuuuu, michi wo tozashi, aruitekuuuu, eien ni..tatchi sukumu, koe mo naku, ikite yuku, eien niiiiiii..**turns around seeing sesshoumaru** how long were you here!?  
  
Sesshoumaru: long enough.  
  
Nikore: well here's your breakfast.**holds out mcdonalds bag**  
  
Sesshoumaru: I don't eat human food.  
  
Nikore: **sighs** it's not human food sesshoumaru, it's cock roach food!!! ^^  
  
Sesshoumaru: oh.ok then  
  
Nikore: and scince you're here.** hold out pile of fan mail** how did thease moronic twits get my address?  
  
Sesshoumeru: ..internet.  
  
Nikore: ...:P  
  
Nikore: **grumble, grumble** fine. **walks into the bed room**  
  
**five mins later**  
  
nikore: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Sessohoumaru: it can't be that scary..**walks back into the room**  
  
**2 mins later**  
  
sesshoumaru: HOLY FUCKING SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
rin: sesshoumaru-sama sounds scared...** peeks her head in** AAAWWWWWWWWWWWW IT'S SO CUTE!!!!!!  
  
Ok like I said before, I'm not going to continue until I get reviews..so nyah **sticks tounge out at the people who are reading this horrible pointless fan fiction with no plot whatsoever** 


	2. part 2the burn D

I would like to thank silver wolf for telling me to continue this story. I didn't think i'd get ANY reviews for this story...and i would like more on this chapter..  
  
LAST TIME: nikore:eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee Sesshoumaru: it can't be that scary **walks in the back room** .....HOLY FUCKING SHIT!!!!!!!! Rin: sesshoumaru sama sounds scared....**she, too walks into the bedroom** AAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWW....it's so CUTE-FUL!!!!!!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*********~~~~~~~~~~**********~~~~~~~~~~~~~*********~~  
  
nikore: SESSHOUMARU!!!! GET THAT THING OUT OF MY HOUSE!!!!  
  
Sesshoumaru: I'M NOT TOUCHING THAT YOU JACKASS!!!!  
  
Nikore and sesshoumaru: A PINK BUNNY!!!!!!!, WHAT DOES IT LOOK LIKE!?!?!?!? **sesshoumaru leave leaves the room with nikore screaming like a consumate maniac, tripping over her own feet as she left**  
  
rin: well I think it's cute but....**takes the (shudder) pink bunny and drops it out the window where it happily hops away** **meanwhile outside**  
  
sesshoumaru: god i'm glad that's over.  
  
Nikore:**laying on her stoumach on a tree branch ** i think i was dignified as i left don't you think?  
  
Sesshoumaru:.....dignified? puh-lease. You wouldn't know dignified if it came up and bit you in the ass!  
  
Nikore: SO I WASN'T THE MOST GRACEFUL PERSIN IN THE WORLD! So what?!it was only time!!!!  
  
sesshoumaru: what about the time you kicked yourself in the face while tying your shoe, or the time you tripped and dropped this big plate of food, or the time you were talking to me and you stupidly ran into a door, or mayby the time you-  
  
Nikore:SHUT UP!!!! I'm not that clumsy! I'm still laying in this tree arn't i?  
  
**suddenly the branch snapped and nikore fell out of the tree**  
  
sesshoumaru: **huge grin** not anymore.  
  
Nikore: @_@...............gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah  
  
Sesshoumaru: you're such a dumass  
  
Nikore: why don't you just take your gay self over to some gay place and have gay sex with other gay people so you can drag your gay self back here and tell me how you're gay experience was!!!!  
  
Sesshoumaru:**trying to think of a comeback ** YOU DON'T HAVE ROOM TO TALK YOU STUPID LESBIAN WHORE!!!!!!  
  
Nikore: I--**notcing what he said, looking at him shoked** what did you just call me? **lowers,her head with her bangs covering her eyes**  
  
Sesshoumaru: that's right, you slut, i wouldn't be talking if i were you...too bad, we could've been together if you weren't gay.  
  
**nikore comes up and slaps him, punching him in the stomach causing him to fall on the ground ,which gave nikore the perfect oppertunity. She takles hima and they accidently tumble into the house, where rin is taking a nap. She sits on his chest and starts punching him to kingdom come**  
  
nikore: YOU STUPID JERK!!**wham** EVEN THOUGH I WOULD SACRIFICE MY DIGNITY AND PRIDE BY LETTING **wham** YOU **wham**AND THAT LITTLE GIRL STAY HERE **WHAM** YOU**WHAM** HAVE**WHAM** THE NERVE**WHAM** TO CALL ME A SLUT AND A WHORE!!!!!  
  
**nikore gets of of him and puts a special dog collar and braclets on him **  
  
nikore YOU STUPID MUTT!!! **hold down the controller button for the braclets**  
  
sesshoumaru: **cries out in extreme pain as the braclets burn through his skin, moves the bracelet up a little,then looks at her very frightned** y- you....YOU GAVE ME A SECOND DEGREE BURN!!!!!!  
  
Nikore: it serves you right **tear well upin her eyes** now say you're sorry!!!**gets out controller for the coller.**  
  
Sesshoumaru: 0.0'''' AAAAAHHHHHH OK OK OK!!!! I'M SORRY I CALLED YOU A WHORE I TRULY AM !!!!!!!!!!  
  
Nikore: good, **returns back to her happy self** want some lunch?  
  
Sesshoumaru: **has the sudden urge to throw her out a window**  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
like it? Hate it? Tell me!!!! I might write another chapter to this, that is if i get good reveiws 


	3. darts RULE! XD

IT'S ABOUT FRIGGIN TIME I GOT THIS CHAPTER UP!!!! FINALLY!!!i'm sorry it took so long people (i think the only on reading this is wolf demon queen of nonsense...)  
  
Nikore**sitting on the couch with rin and sesshoumaru** i'm bored....  
  
Sesshoumaru: i hate you...  
  
Nikore: what? Why?  
  
Sesshoumaru: why? WHY?!?!?!?! **holds up arm with burn on it** YOU BRANDED ME! THAT'S WHY!!!  
  
Nikore: **sniff, sniff** your mean....**tears well up in her eyes**  
  
Sesshoumaru: oh SHIT no!uh... please don't cry...please please please.....  
  
Nikore:...**hic**...are you begging?  
  
Sesshoumaru: YES!  
  
Nikore:.....you're....afraid of me arn't you?  
  
Sesshoumaru: only when you cry....than i can put up with the psycotic bitch you normally are....**realizes what he just said** O_O;;;(thinking) oh crap...i'm up screwed creek without a paddle.....  
  
Nikore:**stares at sesshoumaru for a looooooooooooooooong time**  
  
Sesshoumaru: here it comes **thinking about the pain in his arm**  
  
Nikore: **stares blankly for a little while than** THANK YOU!!!! FLUFFY-KUN!!!**hugs sess REALLY tight  
  
Sesshoumaru: ....life slipping away....can't breathe....  
  
Nikore: sorry...  
  
Sesshoumaru: uuugh good........nikore?  
  
Nikore: yes? **looks at sesshoumaru with loving eyes**  
  
Sesshoumaru: i'm hungry.... can you go get the peanut-butter?  
  
Nikore: -_-;....stand up....  
  
Sesshoumaru: **stands up** why?  
  
Nikore: **kicks sesshoumaru in the shin REALLY hard**  
  
Sesshoumaru:OW DAMMIT! **hits her in the arm and suddenly it's a dog fight (cat fight kinda)) sesshoumaru is kicking and nikore is scratching and biting**which hurts because she's a okami youkai with fangs**)  
  
Nikore:**reaches for blow gun and shoots a dart in his ass** yes!! I got accurate!!!!  
  
Sesshoumaru: ow! Sht!(i meant to leave out the "i"....that's how in say shit....you can't hear the i...)**pulls out dart** when and where did you get this!!!!  
  
Nikore: internet  
  
Sesshoumaru: for how much?  
  
Nikore: 16.00$  
  
Sesshoumaru: you got ripped off  
  
Nikore: **punches sesshoumaru out then pokes his motionless body with a stick** weee.. this is fun..I KNOW!!!! **drags him and nails him too a wall (imagine jesus except he has nailes through his kimono sleeves and pants) and uses him for target practice with her blowgun....nails him 3 times in the forehead and once in the leg when rin wakes up  
  
Rin: what are you doing?  
  
Nikore: hitting sesshoumaru with darts  
  
Rin: you might hurt him!  
  
Nikore: so? Do you have a point?  
  
Rin: no....can i try?  
  
Nikore: hands her her blow gun** sure  
  
Rin:*tries and hits sesshoumaru in the neck** yay!!!  
  
Sesshoumaru:**wakes up**  
  
Rin: o_o;;;  
  
Nikore: O_O;;;;  
  
Sesshoumaru: ow... why am i nailed to a wall and why do i have darts in my forhead?  
  
Nikore: uh.....i dunno....  
  
Sesshoumaru: get me down... now...thease darts hurt and i don't like being stuck on a wall  
  
Nikore: you've obviously mistaken me for someone who actuall gives a shit now haven't you?  
  
Sesshoumaru:...yes i have...  
  
Nikore: **pets sess's head** good dog.**leaves**  
  
Sesshoumaru: oi!!! OU CAN'T JUST LEAVE ME HERE!!!GET BACK HERE WENCH!!!!**looks down at rin** oh good....rin you'll help me.. won't you?  
  
Rin: **takes out darts but than leaves**  
  
Sesshoumaru: WAIT!!!! RIN!!!! NIKORE!!! DAMMIT SOMEONE GET ME DOWN!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! I HATE YOU!!!! IF YOU DON'T GET ME DOWN I SWEAR I'LL KILL YOU!!!!!!!!!!I HATE YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Yes, i know he does.. please review ^_^.... 


	4. my house has a name? more people are liv...

I'm sorry people..i HAVE to change the title too something else because this takes place in about a WEEK ^_^;;;  
  
**sesshoumaru walks into the living room to find nikore on the phone with one of her friends**  
  
nikore: yeah..**giggles**...i still don't see why you like kouga as much as you do..wait.I think I know.he's hotter than anything on the planet?..thought so. OOH!!! OOH!!! I got a suggestion!!!! Wanna live with me and sess-chan?  
  
Sesshoumaru: who are you talking to?  
  
Nikore: **puts hand over mouth piece** someone. Now shut up.**puts phone to ear** so how about it?..........really? YATTA!!!!! Weee!!!! You get to live with me!!!..  
  
Kouga: who's on the phone?  
  
Sesshoumaru: scince when did you get here?  
  
Kouga: scince nikore put me in the story. Now shut up.  
  
Sesshoumaru: why is everyone telling me to shut up today?  
  
Nikore: you do know you might have to got to my school if you live with me. you don't care? Coolio...^_^ happy!!!!  
  
Kouga: she scares me..  
  
Sesshoumaru: you don't have to live with her..  
  
Kouga:..good point  
  
Nikore: guess what!!!! Someone's gonna be-  
  
**doorbell rings**  
  
nikore:..that was fast..**answers door and a girl with luggage comes in two of her friends**  
  
J: hi nikore ^_^  
  
Nikore: hi J!!..uh..hi birdy..  
  
Birdy: SESSHOUMARU!!!!!**glomps**  
  
Sesshoumaru: AAAAAHHHHHHHH GET IT OFF OF ME!!!!  
  
Nikore: what do you want me to do? Get that super anticeptic thing and melt her with it?!  
  
Sesshoumaru: I don't think we have to be that drastic..  
  
Birdy: keh.don't even try it! Don't let her hurt me sesshoumaru-chan!  
  
Nikore:..you prep.GO TO HELL!!!!  
  
Kikyou: this is where I come in!**takes birdy's hand as they both sink into the ground**  
  
Birdy: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**disappears**  
  
Nikore: ...**gets scaringly cheerfull as she turns to a smiling kouga**  
  
Nikore:**singing** ding-dong the witch is dead  
  
Kouga: which old witch?  
  
Nikore: the wicked witch!  
  
Kouga and nikore together:ding-dong the wicked witch is dead..  
  
Sesshoumaru: uh.that was disturbing..  
  
Nikore: uh. well..anyway  
  
J: so? Where's my room?  
  
Nikore: up the stairs  
  
Sesshoumaru: I'll take you there**takes J up the stairs to a room**  
  
J: coooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool do you people like..live in a palace or something?  
  
Sesshoumaru: just look around you.does this look like a sengoku style palace?  
  
J:yes.  
  
Sesshoumaru: oh.  
  
J: **runs down the stairs with a screeching stop in front of nikore** can kouga live here too?  
  
Nikore: why did I see this coming?  
  
Sesshoumaru: him? **points to kouga** live in the suzaku palace? Puh-lease don't make me laugh  
  
Nikore: scince when did my house get a name?  
  
Sesshoumaru: I dunno..scince I realized this house looks like naraku's fortress.  
  
J:CAN HE LIVE HERE OR NOT?!?!?!?!   
  
Nikore: but..but...fine.  
  
J: whoohoo!!! **hugs kouga** you get to live with me!!!!  
  
Nikore: but you people get separate rooms.  
  
J: ugh..awwww man..  
  
Nikore: now that that's settled.  
  
It never occurred to me how short I could write a chapter..anyway..REVIEW!!!! 


	5. waitress

**nikore, J and rin are at a&w looking at the menu**  
  
Nikore: you know..i haven't seen dingbat and dingaling in a while..  
  
J: who?  
  
Nikore: sesshoumaru and kouga!  
  
J: you don't think they could be...  
  
Nikore: huh?.............**the rusty gears slowly start to turn** ..EW! THAT'S SO GROSS!!!!  
  
J: **is laughing herself to death** you have to be the slowest person I know!!!  
  
Rin: whats so gross?  
  
nikore: ...nothing.don't ask  
  
waitress: **comes up in a plaid mini skirt and boots** are you ready to order?  
  
Nikore:**looking at the menu** I'll have a hot dog with nuthin on it and a small strawberry shake.  
  
J: I'll have a bacon double cheeseburger, large fries, a large chocolate shake, mozerella sticks, and onion rings.  
  
Waitress: well aren't we a pig..  
  
J: what!?**looks up** How dare you I should have you fired for thi-- ..SESSHOUMARU!?  
  
sesshoumaru: one word and everyone dies...  
  
Rin: sesshoumaru-sama looks pretty!  
  
Nikore: well. if you're here.. Wheres kouga?  
  
sesshoumaru: over there.**points across the room to a table that kouga is setting down food at**  
  
Nikore: well that's no surprise because he wears a skirt anyway.  
  
**suddenly another waitress comes up**  
  
watress: is this lady bothering you?  
  
Nikore: no...wait..  
  
Nikore and sesshoumaru: marusha?  
  
marusha: cram it...  
  
Nikore: you? A waitress?  
  
sesshoumaru: my my..you have no right to torment me.  
  
Maru-sha: yes I do! At least I'm a GIRL waitress  
  
Sesshoumaru: T_T...  
  
Nikore: poor fluffers.  
  
Sesshoumaru: **really fast** forthelasttimemynameisnotfluffers!!!!! O  
  
Nikore: what is with the fast talking?  
  
sesshoumaru: I get it from you..  
  
Nikore: I don't talk fast..  
  
J: well before you two start arguing in a public place why don't we leave now?  
  
Nikore: fine...  
  
**while at home**  
  
j and nikore: **at the same time** is kousesshogamaru gay?  
  
sesshoumaru and kouga: no.we lost a bet!  
  
nikore: to who?  
  
---------------  
  
I HAVE TO GET OFF THE COMPUTER!!!!! I'M FINISHING THIS STUPID CHAPTER NOW!!!!! 


End file.
